Are you really a world-record holder if you have to lower yourself to counting goals scored against Scotland? Cristiano Ronaldo is an embarrassing fraud.
We have replaced Harry Kane at No. 1 on the England ladder but it’s not because anybody was really any good at all. Oh dear.
An absolute stinker of an England performance ended in a 2-1 Nations League defeat to Greece. A terrible night for Lee Carsley and several of his players.
A Ten Hag sacking at this stage would represent killing the goose that keeps sh*tting out golden 3-0 home defeats to Spurs.
International breaks mean manager rankings, and this feels like a more meaningful manager ranking list than most given the current focus on the ol’ sack race.
We’ve been surprised by quite a few things this season. But mostly by some teams being absolute dogsh*t, like Man Utd and Crystal Palace.
Yes, that’s right. We’ve got 16 Conclusions on a game in which almost nothing happened on a day when two other games had almost everything happen.
Could Sunday really be Erik ten Hag’s final game as Man Utd manager? It’s starting to feel like it might have tipped over from possible to probable.
Manchester United snatched a Europa League point against Porto, but a wild 3-3 draw only confirmed that Erik Ten Hag’s days are numbered.
Spurs did the necessary against Ferencvaros in their second Europa League game, with 17-year-old Mikey Moore the night’s big winner.
It’s easy – and fun – to say the new Champions League format is terrible. But that’s no use unless you offer solutions. Here are five.
Not all of these mistakes were as obvious at the time as Man United failing to put Erik Ten Hag out of his misery, but they were mistakes nonetheless.
This is the ninth time since 2010/11 a Big Six side has had seven points or fewer after six games. So what happened the other eight times?
We’ll understand if you just want to scroll straight down to the losers bit and Manchester United getting another thorough kicking, but there’s praise too for Spurs.
The Barclays Crisis Club heavyweight title is on the line as Manchester United face Spurs, while Man City face another tough test after the Arsenal battle.
Spurs have never treated the Europa League with respect. If they are to deliver Ange’s second-season silverware, that must change.
Erling Haaland’s madcap antics after Man City’s equaliser against Arsenal on Sunday were a reminder that showing the restart live isn’t optional.
Liverpool keeper Alisson and Man City’s Bernardo Silva are the latest members of the anti-anti-football league, along with these cryarsers.
Man City v Arsenal is without question a clash between the two best teams in the country and this was the best game between them since that became true.
Roy Keane has called on Nottingham Forest to fine goalkeeper Matz Sels a week’s wages for his part in Brighton’s second goal on Sunday.
Really weren’t sure what game to pick out as the biggest of the weekend. Sometimes when there is no obvious standout you just have to be creative.
A moment of pure brilliance from David Raya helped Arsenal secure a Champions League point at Atalanta – it’s just a shame that doesn’t really mean much.
This is what UEFA wanted: A bloated Champions League with no jeopardy for the big clubs. They got what THEY wanted anyway.
We are here to exclusively name the next manager of every Premier League club and we begin with Cesc Fabregas for Arsenal.
A varied collection of 10 people and things on borrowed time in the rarefied Premier League air. Yes, Angeball is one of them – fight us.
Silly Spurs stumbled directly into a very obvious Arsenal trap. Plenty of thoughts here on Arteta, Ange, Vicario, Romero and woke kit nonsense.
Mo Salah could break into Liverpool’s top-three all-time goalscorers this season as Erling Haaland races towards Sergio Aguero’s City records.
No prizes for guessing the game of the weekend, but there’s also the prospect of a Man United debutant beginning the trivial task of simply fixing all of their problems.
An absolute head-scratcher of an England ladder this one as we start a new cycle with a new (temporary) manager and an awful lot of guesswork.
Harry Kane’s golden double topped the bill as he joins England’s centurions, but Trent Alexander-Arnold once again revelled in some Liverpool-esque freedom.